The 4 Best Ways to Handle Criticism

Criticism. It’s a way of life for writers. It’s the carrot and the stick that move us forward. It’s the gift of insight. It’s bitter medicine: difficult to swallow, but healing.

Beginners tend to approach criticism one of two ways: They either take it too seriously, or not seriously enough. A more useful approach is to vary your response. How knowledgeable is the person offering the criticism? How much experience do you have with the genre you’re writing in? What have others said about the work? How strong and confident are you feeling? These are just a few of the things that might alter the way you respond to critique.

Rather than a knee-jerk reaction to criticism, I often suggest my coaching clients think seriously about their responses. Here are four techniques to consider the next time you receive a critique of your work. Each one should have a place in your writing life.

Technique 1: Study it.

Years ago, I sat in on a writer’s group in the small town I was living in. I should say at the outset that I’m not a writer’s group kind of person, but there I was.

The writers in this group were all more-or-less beginners. A few had publications in minor journals. A couple were on first novels.

One had gotten a comment back from an editor to whom he’d submitted his mystery novel. The editor had said some good things about his work, but she’d rejected it with the words, “I’m just not sure this is a mystery novel.”

The writer had no idea what the editor meant by this comment, and so he shrugged it off. He told the group he was including the word “mystery” on the first page of his book, so it would be clear to the next editor. Other than that, he wasn’t making any changes.

This editor had offered the gift of criticism, and it was gold. But it was kind of like magic gold that you can’t see unless you know how to look at it.  “I’m not sure this is a mystery novel.” What does that mean? That something in the structure, content, or style of the book didn’t fit what mystery readers (and the editors who serve them) are looking for.

It was the writer’s job to figure out what that was. His response should have been to study other mystery novels—a lot of them. To compare them to his own work. To figure out what was missing or not quite right in his novel. That could have made the difference between getting that novel published and having it languish.

This is probably the most valuable technique you can use. If the criticsm you’re getting is from someone who knows what he’s talking about, study it for all it is worth.

Technique # 2: Set it aside.

There are times in our lives when we’re ready for criticism and times when we’re not. If you’ve just written a heartfelt tribute to a loved one who’s died, or a touching memoir of a difficult time in your life, listening to that work criticized may be a little like having surgery without anesthesia.

Or perhaps you simply feeling vulnerable right now. Maybe you’ve had too many disappointments this month. Maybe you’re stressed or sad or in a depression.  

If criticism feels like too much to take right now, don’t take it. Set it aside. If you aren’t ready for it, you won’t be able to work with it anyway. Slip the critique into a folder. Put it away. Don’t look at it for a month or a year. Work on something else, and come back to it when you’re ready.

Technique # 3: Get a second opinion. Or a third.

I used to write a lot of articles for regional magazines. The editor of one sent a piece I’d written to 3 reviewers. Along with various suggestions for changes in the content of the article, each reviewer commented on my style. One said, “Her style is delightful! Very crisp and clear!”  Another wrote: “I love the readable writing style here.” And the third said: “Her style is terrible. This article reads like a textbook.”

This is a stark example, but not an unusual one. Three different reviewers, two completely different takes on the style of my article.

Since I was a seasoned writer by the time I penned the article and felt confident of my writing, I ignored the naysayer, and the article was published with some minor revisions. But what if that person had been the only reviewer of my article? What if I’d just been starting out? I might have taken that criticism to heart and spent a lot of wasted effort creating a style that wasn’t my own.

Before you start doing major revisions, have a second or third reader evaluate your work. A second voice can give you the clarity and confidence you need to either make changes or keep your manuscript just as it is.

Technique # 4: Ignore it.

Breaking news: Criticism is personal opinion. It isn’t written in stone, divinely inspired, or woven into the fabric of the Universe. Some criticism should be heeded. Some should be ignored.

Like the first-time mystery novelist in the example I gave earlier, you should start out by studying—looking thorough and in detail at what the criticism means. But if you do that and you still don’t get it, it is perfectly all right to slip the critique gently into the nearest shredder and get on with your life.

Do you have a technique you use for addressing criticism? Share it here!