There is something sacred to me about the turn of one year to the next—even though objectively, it just means I’ll have to replace “2014” with “2015” when I write the date. I experience the new year as a time of looking back—appraisal, repentance, pride, reconciliation—and looking forward—excitement, joy, and fear.
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Fear? Yes. Because, for all our resolutions and plans, the money we’ve saved, the work we’ve done, and the moral credits we feel we’ve earned by being good girls and boys, the new year that lies ahead is really a vast unknown.
Despite our desire to believe we’re in control of the future, we know very little about what lies ahead.
As writers, for example, we don’t know:
Where our work will lead us.
How long our projects will take.
Whether our work will be published.
What ideas will come to us.
What obstacles will suddenly fall across our path.
What opportunities will come our way.
One of my books took six years to write. One took six months. Twice in my life, publishers I’d never contacted called me out of the blue wanting to see books I was writing. Both ended up publishing those books. On the other hand, I once had an agent who had loved one of my novels so much she paid for it to be edited, change her mind at the last minute and freeze me off like a wart on her backside. I couldn’t have predicted any of it.
So with all this uncertainty looming ahead, how can we keep from crawling into bed and pulling the covers over our heads?
How can we step forward into the vast unknown of the coming year without becoming unhinged?
The good news is that there are some very simple steps we can take to make the uncertainty bearable—and even exciting. Here are four of them.
Make flexible plans. At one time, I thought I could get control of my anxiety by making a rigid, detailed outline of what I hoped to accomplish. Sometimes, I went so far as to make a list of accomplishments for each week of the year ahead!
These schedules were a little like medieval calendars: They soon began to veer from reality and, eventually, they were totally out of whack.
Of course, plans are important. But they should be liquid, not solid—able to go with the flow.
Be willing to let go of control. Western culture teaches us that we can and should control our own destinies. We’re supposed to be in charge, take life by the reins.
What escapes our notice much of the time is the fact that no one actually has much control over what happens to them. Doing the “right” things can give us a fighting chance to live long, healthy, happy, successful lives—but at any moment, we can still step out in front of a bus.
Learning to let go of control is one of the healthiest things we can do. Our control over the future is not completely absent, but it is weak, limited, and subject to change. Living with an awareness of those limits is a blessing.
Be present in the moment. So you can’t control the future. You don’t know if your book is going to get published and make you rich and famous or the phone is going to ring with devastating news. You can be pretty sure a meteor isn’t going to fall on your head any time soon, but you can’t be completely sure.
What you can be sure of is that you are here now. You are in this moment, living, feeling, thinking, breathing, being. The best possible way to deal with uncertainty is to take the advice of spiritual leader Ram Dass: Be here now.
Enjoy the adventure. The writing life isn’t a stroll in the park, where you know the tulips will be blooming and nice Mr. Jones will be walking his golden retriever. It’s a journey through strange mountains. Around the next corner may be a resting place, a band of brigands, or a breathtaking view. That’s what makes it exciting. If everything were laid out for us, imagine how dull life would be.
Embrace that excitement. Enjoy the journey. Step forward into that adventure and have a happy New Year!
I found the above most interesting, I might be an ‘ancient’ Humanist but like using my mind (for what it is…) and learning on life’s journey. I’m a firm believer in thinking for myself and am a bit ‘outside the box.’
The world would be so much better if we appreciated each moment, paused, took stock and didn’t follow the sheep…
Beautifully said, Joy.